Gnocchi with Sage, Parmesan, and butter.

Andre, my fiance, is an amazing cook. He makes me dishes all the time which are savory and home style, which can be soul food when your having a rough day.One of the best dishes he makes, is Sage and Parmesan cheese.

Hope you guys enjoy this as much as I do.

• 2 (12 ounce) packages potato gnocchi
• 1/4 cup butter
• 1 clove garlic, minced
• 1 teaspoon dried sage

• 1/4 teaspoon salt
• 1/4 cup grated Parmesan cheese
• 1/4 teaspoon ground black pepper
• 2 tablespoons grated Parmesan cheese
  
  

  Directions

• Bring a large pot of lightly salted water to a boil over high heat. Add the gnocchi pasta, and cook until they float to the surface, 2 to 3 minutes; drain.
• Melt the butter in a skillet over medium heat. Stir in the garlic, and cook until the garlic has softened and is beginning to turn golden brown, about 4 minutes. Stir in the sage and salt for a few seconds, then add the cooked gnocchi. Toss gently with 1/4 cup of Parmesan cheese and the pepper. Sprinkle with the remaining 2 tablespoons Parmesan cheese to serve.
   

(http://allrecipes.com/recipe/gnocchi-with-sage-butter-sauce/)

The word "Authentic", and the lie it sells.

 Authenticity in all it's glory

I was at church on Sunday, and realized that our reverend, brought up the topic of being Authentic, as a person. What struck me as odd with this, was that I've been hearing from so many people, for such a long time, that the most fulfilled life is one where we live "Authentically" to ourselves.

My mother first began telling me this when I was a teen. Teachers began using the term in University and College, even former supervisors, and now my reverend. The term seems to be endearing and stand for some higher achievement of the person and the fulfillment of the soul. Yet when I ask people what that means, they are always quick to offer a vague explanation, and quickly move to a new topic.

In hopes of finding the meaning, I searched the internet.  I found a wonderful definition which reads "Authenticity is the development and expression of your essential self, uncensored, undiluted, unimpeded by external forces. The real you, not a circumstantial, conditional, contingent version of you." ("Live Authentically" by Tom Murcko. http://www.howtolive.com/live-authentically/). In reading the steps and definition more thoroughly, I began to realize that while I have always aspired to this, and while I have admired people who do this regularly, the truth is that this is the biggest lie we preach to one another. 

The goal of living authentically is a beautiful one, and in an ideal world where people embraced it, the concept would have truly amazing benefits on society as a whole. The reality is something rather different, though. 

To live authentically, you are to put into practice what you feel and believe to be true in your heart. It's to stop censoring your expressions, and to be sincere and live candidly. Thinking back on the times I have done this in life, all I can come up with is times when I have received punitive retributions for such actions. 

I have had supervisors tell me that I should be "authentic" and be unafraid to challenge myself and my superiors to ensure that  the best course of action is taken. However, when a worker practices this, they quickly find that they are the target of that pretty pink slip made paper airplane, that is aimed for their backs. Telling a professor that you disagree with their thesis, results in a very authoritative lecture to the class that they "have been working to have an opinion for the past eight years to become a professor, and upon you achieving the same, you will then be entitled to an opinion, but until then you will accept the one [they] provide you for your next paper."

Do we Practice what we preach?

Countless times throughout life, I have been told everything from: You shouldn't tell people about your relationship with another man. You should watch what you post on Facebook, because you don't know how someone will use it, or if they will take it to your boss to attempt to declare you unfit. You should show respect for your elders, even if you don't feel it. etc.

Society weaves this fantasy into the heads of the coming generations, telling them to be individuals, and be true to themselves. Then Society turns around and tells them, don't do that because you could offend or  hurt someone, or you may be punished for it later. You must be true to yourself, but you must conform and follow the Societal norm, for fear of who or how it may be taken.

We tell ourselves that living this life will bring us joy and self fulfillment, but the reality is that fulfillment and joy, don't pay the mortgage, the bills, or the living expenses of life. In order to do that, you need to go to work in a good paying career, where you conform to what your executives feel is suitable for the role. You need to play the political game of the office atmosphere, and try to ensure your survival in the world.

Do you live a lie?

So I pose this question to my readers: Do you live the lie of the world, pretend to be authentic, and then conform when in public to survive; Or do you live authentic 100% of the time, and say to heck with the world. When you conform, does it slowly kill your soul until your a bitter executive, and do you feel like you sold out? When you live authentically the entire time, do you find the world around you seems to be screaming conform and give in, as though you were not designed for the world you live in?

The point

Think about your life, and how you want to live it. Do you want to be the executive, who sees others as liabilities and numbers in the world; or the person everyone else see's as radical? When you go to sleep at night, can you be content with what you have taught your children and the next generation that is all around you? Did you tell them to wear that bandana at school, even though they were banned, and then stand behind them when they got sent to the principles office? Did you stand by them when they told someone they didn't like a meal, an outfit, or a gift; Or did you correct them because Society says that being honest is rude?
 

If we are ever to truly live authentically, then we have to accept others for who and what they are. We have to see a role for them in the world, and embrace their difference. Sadly, while I continue to strive to live this utopian ideal, I have to believe that I don't think the world is ready, or willing, to accept "Authenticity" the way it preaches it, and asks us to practice it. 

I for one say, embrace it as much as you can. Explore the world, challenge ideals, and be unafraid to speak your truths. Stand behind those who are independent and you agree with, because they may just be right. Be who you are, and stand for what you believe in. Be willing to come at the world from a stance of logic everyday, and be prepared to realize that your world can and will change. You are not constricted to the beliefs of your friends, family, or forefathers. Being openly gay requires a step towards being authentic, and living it honestly shouldn't be a sign of weakness; but a sign of strength.  I've embraced who I am, and who I want to be. I'm quirky, with a million thoughts a day. I ask my friends, family, especially my fiance, morally ethical questions regularly, because they pop into my head. I act goofy at times, caring and genuine in other times, and independently on a very regular basis. 

I've learned from the people around me, the ones that I admire most, that everyday is open to possibilities. I've learned that sometimes the best ice breaker is to start random, saying "I like toast. How about you?" It may be random, but it's honest, and it's going to grab their attention. I've learned that laughing at the world and the weird things in it, can be harmless, and fun. Going for midnight walks, high only on life and lack of sleep, can be breath taking. So I choose to live as I am, uncensored and true to me. Take it or leave it, but I can tell you honestly that if you embrace me, I'll never be boring to be around.

Finding meaning in the World through Hobbies

       Taking some time off from the world, and looking at focusing on my own goals and hobbies has been almost cathartic. When I was visiting my family, my mother told me I should consider writing a book. Merely sitting down and writing, to see where it would take me. My fiance has encouraged that I embrace my hobbies around the house, by finishing painting projects (such as the banisters), focusing on the wedding details and planning, etc.

     I've had the privilege of being able to explore new career options, recharging my internal batteries, and finding my passions again. Last weekend, I babysat my nephews, without thinking about work I should be doing, or errands I should be otherwise running. I breathed easy, and enjoyed playing with 2 cute little boys, who just want to hang out and have fun with their uncle playing cars, or Skylanders. It was refreshing.



    Last night, I began doing what my mother suggested, and began writing. I read articles online about how to write, how to come up with a story, theme, plot, and a whole other world. I began writing, and the story just began to flow on it's own. It may not win a Pulitzer prize, or top the New York Best seller's charts, but it will be mine, and maybe someday when it's complete I'll try sending it to a publisher for kicks. I promise that before I send it to a publisher, my readers will have first view of the book, and I'm alright with creative criticism. Who knows, maybe you will be the first people to read the next great novel, and have had the fast track first glimpse of it, with your own claim on it's fame.

The greatest realization I've had is that all these years of thinking I had horrible grammar, spelling, and run on sentences, was because I had too many thoughts in my head and no where to release them. I rambled because I felt rushed to put it on paper, and be as short and concise as I could be with my details. Having a blog, and writing a story, are so much different from that. You begin writing, as though watching a movie in your head, and describing what you see and hear. Quickly the characters take on a role all their own, and before long, you have this world that your brain created as if it were an alternate reality of it's own. You then begin to appreciate the writing itself, editing it. You start thinking about whether or not you should write as the omnipotent narrator, or first person from the perspective of your character. It becomes it's own world for you to enjoy.

At the moment I've begun realizing that much like J.M. Barrie, author of the original Peter Pan, you enter your own world, that you can begin sharing with the rest of the world, or keep to yourself. The laws of the everyday world can fade away to whatever you want them to be, and no one can tell you it's wrong. It's almost as though you are the king and master of your own world.

What I also realized, was that I have so many stories to write. There's the thoughts I'm working on at the moment. There's stories of an lovable yet eccentric woman who marches to her own beat, and fascinates the world with all the trouble she gets into on her journey's. There's even potential for ones about an entire zoo made up of miniature animals from around the world.

While Andre found Knitting over the holidays as a new hobby, I found literature again. I found reading, and with the spark of my imagination, I found writing.

I think one of the largest problem that we face as a society in our consumer driven, productivity encouraged, working world, is that we stopped having hobbies. I'm looking forward to going back out to my workshop (ok, so it's a shed with a lot of fun tools in it), and making a backing for my sister in laws dining room chair that's broken. I look forward to painting the banisters, as tedious as they may be to do, and all the construction jobs around the house I wanted to tackle when we first bought it. Andre found knitting, and he's getting good at it. I'll soon have a scarf, and he'll have a book to critique, and at nights, we're no longer sitting here bored and uninteresting. We can now have discussions on why his knitting needles broke, and he can show me the patterns of Sweaters, Scarves and blankets he wants to learn to knit. I get to share my characters, and theoretical discussions on their nature and how they'll react to plot twists. We get to sit down at night, and enjoy one another again, instead of enjoying the best of Netflix, over and over and over, in silence.

While a lot of people will tell you that certain hobbies are expensive, the truth of the matter is that it's a lot less costly than the Psychiatrist you're going to spend 10 years with weekly, after 20 years of an uneventful marriage, or even the cost of feeling drained and dead on the inside all the time. People need hobbies, and it's hard to think that we are losing them. Our parents went bowling on Friday nights, played card games, and told us to go to bed while they laughed in the kitchens of our homes into the wee hours of the mornings some weekends, because it brought them some meaning and joy to an otherwise boring standard work week in a factory or pushing paper somewhere.

Hobbies can be anything that you're passionate about and don't have to start by costing a lot of money. A book is often less than the cost of a weeks worth of coffee, and better for your brain. A salt water aquarium is slow and costly to begin, but provides countless amounts of  time you can spend watching the underwater world, and planning the next steps. Heck card games can even become expensive if you allow them to, but can also provide thousands of hours of laughing and enjoyment with family and friends.

In the end, we need hobbies as much as we do breathable air. We've lost track of what hobbies can be and what we can do with our time, other than television. So why not pick a new one, and embrace it. I'd love some ideas of new hobbies, because there's not a huge creative list on the internet yet, and if we want to reverse the oppressive crushing role of Society into mindless drones, we're going to need a list like that one.

The Next Harry Potter?!?

            Since I have been able to have some time to pursue more work in my other passions, I sought to find a new book that would be to captivate me and give me an adventure. As a global nation we all got hooked on the Harry Potter series, by J.K Rowlings. After that we had a mass following of the Twilight Series, by Stephanie Meyers, and then the world began it's search for another book series. The problem with all book series, is that it's hard to find one that everyone can relate to, can fall in love with, and can become enveloped by the fascinating new world it creates.

While I have been looking for such series myself, I have found a couple, but they have never truly taken off in the media. So, when I found the book "The Iron Trials" which was the first in a five book series by Holly Black and Cassandra Clare. Holly black is the best selling author of the "Spiderwick Chronicles" series, which has had a large following in the teen genre along with producing the movie of the same title.  Cassandra Clare is the new york times best selling author for her "Mortal Instruments" series, and also her "Infernal Devices" series.


Suffice to say, when the two teamed up to write a novel series together, I decided it would likely be a good read. My fiance, lovingly, bought me a copy of the book and I became enthralled in it immediately. The book focuses on a boy who is supposed to fail the trials for the "Magisterium" which governs a secret academy for mages. The plot has great twists right from the beginning prologue, when you find out something is different about the main character, but never knowing what it is until almost the end of the book. Essentially, before I give away a ton of plot spoilers here, I found the book to be enough like Harry potter to intrigue me, while being also different enough, that it's not just another fantasy story that's been rebranded.

I highly recommend it for anyone looking to get a jump on another of the literary worlds greatest books.

Green? Christmas? What kind of weird world did I just step into?

I recently took a trip down to my parents place, in Southern Ontario. Since my inlaws live up north, and my family is all down south, we make an effort to split the holidays each year, and swap which year we do Christmas with each family.

While I drove the wonderful six hours, Titan (my 103lbs American bulldog) snoring in the backseat, and Andre cat napping in the passenger seat, I was happy to listen to the festive Christmas station on the XM radio. I was finally getting in the mood of the holidays, because it's unavoidable when you hear 6 different versions of Rudolph the red nosed reindeer in an hour.

When I got to my home town, I thought "this is perfect, I'll finally be off the highway and be able to see the lights, snow, etc." The reality was, that the grass was green, it was 11 degrees out, and on almost every street, there were only a handful of houses decorated with lights. The shocking surprise, was it was already Christmas eve.

While I would have hoped that this was merely one street, and the rest was better, it wasn't. Every street, every road, every house I passed over the holidays, there was an average of 1 in every 7 that had lights or decorations.

The point I quickly realized, is that as a Society, we have begun to become so consumed with ourselves and personal lives, that no one could be bothered to decorate. "It takes too much time", "it's a pain taking it all down", "I don't want to pay the hydro bill", etc. are all the excuses we tell ourselves for why we don't do it. The reality is, that the people who are suffering the most, are the kids.

When I was small, I loved going to town to see all the Christmas lights, the decorations, the trees lit up. They reminded me of the season, the warm feeling of Christmas, and the excitement. Now, I'm horrified to know what kids think, because they see streets bare, and houses dark. Think about it this year for yourself, and tell me you didn't notice half the street without any lights on it.

While I was with my mom, she even admitted that she felt the need to bring back some holiday traditions soon, because she also felt that the lack of her tree, garland, and lights, made Christmas "just another day". I began thinking about it, and realized, she was right.  When I was a child, we started Christmas after my birthday in November. It began after hunting season, with the hunter's ball. An evening of socializing, drinks, great food, and the company of my dad's hunting party and their families. They would joke nostalgically about the year of hunting, who fell in the river getting soaked, who missed the deer and hit that tree, and the ever illusive yet highly coveted mythical 18 point buck that they always saw, yet never got. The night would be magical, fun, and the beginning of "Christmas".

The Week my father would go hunting, we knew was the same week we could put up the Christmas tree, and the lights. The weekends that followed would include baking for the holidays, with a full Saturday of Cookie making, pies, etc. all in preparation of the week of Christmas. It was the time when we knew snow would begin falling, cousins and family would come over for cards and midnight tobogganing in the pasture with moonlight, and candles hung from the trees in mom's mason jars.  We'd come back for hot chocolate, chips, veggies and dip, and a game of UNO extreme that would last until the late hours of the evening. We had Christmas Caroling, Santa Clause Parades, and large city light displays to go see while we drank hot chocolate.

On Christmas Eve my sister and I would have been up with family and friends at the house, after candlelit mass at church, and  movies like the Grinch, and Frosty playing on the television, and card games, and laughing carried on from the dinning room.

When we woke up on Christmas morning, anxiously at 4am, because we barely slept and knew Santa had come, we would creep down the stairs and sit at the bottom, calling to our parents in our Pj's, asking them if we could come down, and if Santa had been there. When we got to come down, mom would let us take in the majesty of the presents under the tree, the lights, the stockings, and we could peek around and look at all the wrapping paper's, while she and Dad got coffee's and made breakfast. (The rule in our house was you had to eat breakfast before opening presents, because 90% of the time, we'd have eaten all the sugar in our stockings and then say we had sore tummies and no room for a proper meal, otherwise)

With coffee in hand, and a belly of waffles, eggs and bacon, etc. mom and dad would come back into the living room with us, and we would find a spot on the living room floor. Dad was the official present distributor, and mom would have a large garbage bag for the wrapping paper. We would each get a gift, and get to open it one at a time. The excitement filling us each time as we opened a present, and showed one another. We would slip into the bathroom to try on new Pj's, or shirts and pants. We'd be pressing the buttons on our toys to hear what they did, until Dad could undo the cumbersome ties that held them in place in their packaging. We would show mom what Santa brought and dance around the living room with excitement.

After we had finished, we would thank mom and dad for the things they brought us, and weren't from Santa. We would clean up the living room and all the presents, and play with the items for an hour or so. Then we would get dressed and get ready, going to my grandparents house for Christmas with the rest of the family. There was always lots of different food to eat and pick at, cousins to play with and show the things you got, or they got from Santa, and play with each others toys. The week would continue this way with visits from different family, more games and good eats. By New Years Eve, everyone would have seen one another at least once, and then we would have a New Years Eve Celebration to ring in the New Year, and cap off the entire week.

Christmas time was magical, energetic, and special. When it ended, you looked forward to next year, and the excitement it would bring again. However, that all seemed to disappear as time went on, and eventually it seemed to stop for a few years, when my grandmother (who loved Christmas and always made it special) passed away. The year after seemed to be one in which no one wanted to celebrate because she wouldn't be there, and slowly everyone drifted away. The Odd part was that the rest of the world seemed to feel this drift and disconnect too, and maybe it had for a while, because I could remember thinking it was slowly changing for the worse when I was a teenager. Ten years later, only five houses out of a street of fifty have lights. A week of laughter and cheer, has dwindled down to rushed visits with family all crammed in a 3 day period. The magic that was Christmas has become a consumer holiday of shopping and boxing day sales, all about numbers and financial margins for the whole of Society.

Sadly, I listened to a statistic on the radio while I drove, in which it said 58% of people would be working over the holidays, and out of the remaining people who were not working 78% would still be working from home or checking in on work. These statistics all having gone up between 10-20% from 2007.

Where did Christmas go? Better yet, Why did we ever let it go?

Next year, I hope you all think of this. Put up the lights, and the trees, and the garland. Spend time baking, and Socializing, drinking and playing games. Christmas isn't about the items, the shopping, the WORK. It's about taking some time off, and spending it with actual people, having fun, forgiving a year of stupid issues, and bringing people back together. The WORLD was happier at Christmas, and the only way to make that happen for the next generation, is if we stop thinking about ourselves, and once again remember the meaning of the season, be it Kwanza, Christmas, Hanukkah, whatever. Tradition has it's place in the world, and destroying it for children because we are too lazy, or our bosses are concerned about numbers, is a cop out. Make the time, and if your an employer of a large company, give as many people the time off as you can, because the work and the margins, are still going to be there on January 2, but your workers will be more productive and happy because of that one week they finally relaxed. 

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!

Sausage, Carmalized Onion, and Date Pizza

 

 While the title may sound unappealing, I've got to tell you that this pizza is AMAZING. While I was at my mother in laws house one Saturday, she decided to be adventurous and try this pizza as an appetizer. While some people may be turned off by the idea of it, and the combination of toppings seems irreconcilable with each other, they go together to make an incredible experience for your pallet. 

My mother in law told me that a co-worker of hers, named Rinnada (my apologizes if I misspelled that) had suggested it as something new to attempt. The result, although admittedly not shared by everyone, was one I thoroughly enjoyed. The taste of the spiced Italian sausage mixed with the tangy barbeque sauce and the sweetness of the onions and dates, made this an instant favorite for me.

Try it out, and let me know what you think. Any pizza dough will do, different Barbecue sauces may add different flavors and experiences, and if your brave try the Gorgonzola (blue cheese). I for one will be honest in saying that I'm no fan of blue cheese, and went with mozzarella. The only other alteration I would suggest is that if you are using a store bought pre-baked dough (works absolutely fine), cut the cooking time down to about half.

Bon Appetit!

Recipe:
http://www.vintages.com/superstars/21/index.shtml?ontariowines

Day 2

Well this morning, readers, was interesting. So before I get into anything heavy, I decided we should all take a moment and laugh at my morning.

It was around 7:30am, I got up with the amazing man in my life, while he got ready for work. Last night I had parked my truck behind him, so I needed to move it out of his way, and send him off. We live in a very small rural little hamlet, with nice neighbors, a post office, and a variety store. With that in mind, I figured no one is going to be getting up real early, no one is going to see what I'm wearing, so no big deal.

I went out in my red and blue plaid Pj pants, black house coat (that is missing it's tie up) and my clunky beige Timberland hiking boots. (Picture it and laugh, because it's not as pretty as it sounds.) I started the vehicles to warm them up, brushed the 3 inches of fresh snow off, said my good byes to Andre, and then felt like an idiot when he waved to our neighbor across the very empty cul-de-sac. I wish that I could honestly say this was the worst thing my neighbor has ever seen, but it isn't.

So after my fiance leaves for work, I park my truck back in the drive way so the snow plow does not get annoyed, quickly shovel the spot in front of our door, and attempt to go inside. We have a numeric lock on the door, because I suck with keys, and if ever you have one I warn you that sometimes they stop working in the cold weather. Yep, that was it. The door would accept the code, unlock, but the lever would not move the latch inside to let me into the house. I was officially locked out.

Since I had been home most of the week, I had been very efficient. I had latched all the windows, and the patio door. I had locked up my shed, and tools for the winter, etc. I couldn't even call Andre to come back because I hadn't taken my cellphone off the nightstand while I was leaving. I was outside, both pets in the house staring at me through the door, thinking that I look like hell, and if I can't find a way in, I'm going to have to go to a neighbor to use their phone, shirtless, with a house coat that won't do up, and looking like someone from "the hills have eyes" who just got out of bed.

Thankfully, I found a basement window that I had forgot to lock, and could climb in through. I slid it open, got down on hands and knees, and began climbing in while the Cat decided that my toes looked like they needed to be licked and batted at. While I was half way through, I looked up to realize, my neighbor behind our house, is in his yard, watching me, probably because he thought I was a burglar. That is until he realised it was me, is smiling like he's about to wet his pants from laughter, and waves saying "Hi Adam. Locked out? all good?".

When I got in the house, I almost died laughing at myself. I looked like an absolute idiot, and yet I didn't care. It was funny.

That was when I realized, I couldn't remember the last time I laughed so hard. I had worked every day, including most weekends, for my career, over the past four years. I hadn't stopped, laughed, or even enjoyed myself in so long, that I couldn't remember the last time I had laughed like this.

So today, I want everyone to stop for a minute, and laugh. Whether its at me, or at something stupid you can think you did today, whatever. Stop and Laugh, because in honesty, it finally felt Amazing.

You know Andre is smart, and he made me watch an Oprah You tube video, which really put things in perspective earlier in the week for me. I know when you think you tube, your thinking "just another fad video that popped up." The truth is that Oprah, and let's be honest its wise if Oprah said it, made a good point. She said that there is no such thing as failure, and you need to relax. She pointed out that when you fail at something, or do something wrong in your life, it's the worlds way of telling you, that you lost focus, and got off track. The only thing you need to do, is sit, calm yourself, relax, and figure out where your path is again, so that you can get back onto it.  (Watch the video clip)

https://www.facebook.com/video.php?v=796092163770905

Oprah's right, which is an understatement and the point of Today. I forgot how to laugh at the little things, how to have fun in the crazy crisis driven world I was functioning in. I needed to have a forced to resign to find that part of myself again, and to figure out new goals for myself. The largest regret I have with coming to this understanding of my life, is that I knew this once.

In College I had a teacher who taught our counseling class. She made us begin the lesson each day, by making every student talk about one perfect moment. One moment that was impacting, positive, and moving, from our week. She told us that every day we needed to find that moment, because there was a ton of despair, misery, and sadness in the world, and that people would show us that as a counselor. It was our role to find the positive, find that moment of Awe in our own lives, so that we could find it in theirs and help shed light on it for them.

So today, laugh. Find something, as small as it could be, that brought you even a moment of joy to your day. Focus on that moment, embrace it, and remember; "There are no mistakes" You have a supreme Destiny to embrace, and you simply have to find it."There are no wrong paths, failure is just that thing that is trying to move you in a new path." - Oprah